2pm this afternoon…

Breathing: A natural state of being we all take for granted, until we can’t.

For years my husband has suffered from seasonal allergies that for a few weeks each year would shut down his ability to breathe without lots of OTC medical intervention. He had always dealt with the allergies and the occasional sinus infection with minimal (okay, a bit more than minimal) complaining until this past winter when he began getting sinus infections every month. Yes, infections every month, and complaining every day. That’s when we had both had enough.  A trip to the doctor and then to an ENT determined that his allergies were multiple and some actually off the charts, but his real problem was that his septum and sinuses were a mess. A really big mess.

So now my husband is in surgery and I am sitting in a freezing cold waiting room beside a giant bank of windows overlooking a parking lot, and wondering…

– will this help?

– will he be able to breathe again?

– if he can breathe again, will he be able to sleep again (finally)?

– if he can breathe again, what will he find to complain about instead?

– and finally, what will this surgery do to the endearing little curve in his nose? (A result of a fight long before I met him.)

As I wait and ponder those questions I can’t help but also consider how our roles are reversed today. Since my diagnosis with Crohn’s almost ten years ago,  it has always been me in the hospital gown and slip resistant socks with tubes in my arms while he sits wondering how long the procedure will take, and if when its all said and done, will it help, will everything be okay. Now it’s the other way around. The circle of life.

10pm this evening…

Home again.

It was a long surgery followed by a very long time in recovery. The doctor’s exact words to described my husband’s septum and sinuses was “jacked up.” Doctor speak for REALLY BAD. We left the surgery center with instructions, prescriptions, and  a bunch of gauze pads strapped to my husband’s nose with rubberbands and medical tape (an odd but very efficient system to contain bleeding).

A quick stop to pick up the baby and a surprisingly decent drive through rush hour traffic landed us at home in good spirits and hopeful for a restful evening. Instead we discovered that our air conditioning had decided to die while we were out. As it turns out, the A/C’s capacitator was “jacked up” too.

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